Disclaimer: This letter is just another side of being unemployed and holds the discussion which we do with ourselves or close friends during that period. I never intend to submit cover letter of these kind to hiring professionals.
To whom it may concern,
I am writing this letter to you with at least an assurance to break up the monotonicity of your valued work, of hiring new and bright employees for your company.
Surrounded with piles of envelopes, and envelopes with courteously formatted A4 sheets, and sheets with formatted sentences and words with the hope to get selected for your company, you must be thinking what this cover letter has in offer for you. I am sure that you must be flowing every day with the ‘dedicated’, ‘motivated’, ‘sincere’, ‘passionate’, ‘hard-working’, ‘team-player’ with excellent ‘leadership qualities’ and ‘time-management’ skilled authors applicants with some of them having ‘’’pythonated’’’ a management portal, a few other artificially intelligent % octaved % geeks, and rest all definitely atleast an <> i <> HTMLian <>/i<> or <sout.<>TAB<>>Java+Cian (** See bottom for the descriprion) only to be able to get up picked by the institutes and companies like you. Some of them are tri-lingual and some astoundingly can watch movies in six. A large portion have been managers, seniors or coordinators promising ground-breaking ideas, increased revenues and steep growth.
Certainly, I am cognizant of the ‘unmeant’ languages requiring compilation and management ahead of bringing on something excitedly amazing at times, but having spent 15 precious seconds (this is the average time you must be keeping to actually reject an application), you must be wondering out of your seat, really, does this applicant boast of anything type-casted above? Should I keep reading this puzzling unprofessional letter?
Well, here’s the answer for you. There’s never been a manager, accountant, senior executive etc. to my profile. I had never been a leader to a ‘team of leaders’ and I cannot speak and write in more than two languages. And here, you must have now started folding the paper to try out your directed aim to the runt of papers in the dustbin. After all, this is one of your favourite pastime for the rejected papers if you are young enough and non monotonous!
But, I do have something in offer for you. Untapped endowment and promise to be successfully experimented in full capacity. This is what I offer. In the battle of what I have done and what I could do if given the right opportunity, I offer my potential to you which unfortunately has never been utilized just because it has never been utilized before. I do not boast of providing optimistic warmth to even the darkest of situations and workplaces because I had never been into it but without flowery statements and grandiose declarations, I say, let an experiment (this is what you will call it) happen. Let an individual have a start to the situations you want him to have been while floating out the advertisements for the application.
And yes, I congratulate you, to be able to make incredibly difficult decisions everyday picking up the choice for you, among such prospective and promising candidature. I for one certainly do not envy your position and wish you the very best for search of the candidates who are what they really promise.
With all hope, this piece of writing wasn’t just a probability of breaking mundane tediousness of 9-5 Thursday,
The potential in me
** HTML, Java, C, Python and Octave are software/platforms which computer professionals use to develop any portal or software. sout TAB is a command in Java for print and some other stray characters are just a part of kind of syntax/command used in those languages.